This is perfectly normal in a society that runs on the idea of going more than the energizer bunny himself. But I think it's pretty sad to admit that if I hadn't had surgery this past week, I would probably still be trying to run on empty.
Sure, the main culprit is definitely my lack of rest in being still with God. This culprit has a few accomplices, though, and they can be downright sneaky.
Take stubbornness, for instance. I refuse to rest until I've got something done. If I can't finish it quickly enough, I set it on the back burner...but my point here is, I still turn the burner on!! Oh, the guise of rest that isn’t actually rest.
Or take lack of discipline. Even if I need to go to work late, like at 12 or 2 (I work part time), I still need to go to bed at a decent hour for the sake of my husband. This is difficult because I have insomnia, but oftentimes instead of at least trying to wind down I think to myself, well, I probably won’t get tired for at least an hour, so I should do something productive. And so, I start reading a good book...and I’ll still be reading at 5 in the morning because I didn't get the slightest wave of sleepiness.
This not resting thing is a problem!
One of the reasons I'm thankful for the surgery: it was a pause in the rapid stream of time that enabled me to screw my head back on and re-align my heart with God.
I sat around and did nothing. I did whatever I wanted to (sort of) for about a week that didn’t involve work, and IT WAS INCREDIBLE.
|*url led to un-forseen blog (the heart of the matter). Check it out!|
I had been thinking a lot lately that I just want to have a week off of work and ‘life’ in general so I can breathe again…and I was blessed with this glorious opportunity through surgery.
If you’re like me, slow down!! It’s ok to not be productive sometimes. It’s even ok not to feel guilty about it.
Welcome rest. No, better yet, pursue rest. Be refreshed!