Not Sneaking (What I've been up to as a writer)

At the top of my blog I mention that I’m an aspiring author/novelist, but I haven’t dished out the details about what I’m up to…until now! 

I’ve had this Sci-fi/Fantasy novel series concept going in my head for about 8-9 years. I know, I know...it seems like a monstrous chunk of time (because it kind of is ^_^’). 

But during college I didn’t have time to invest in writing, and during high school I had no idea what I was doing. Case in point, I threw away the first 115 pages of my handwritten manuscript because it was complete garbage. It took me ages just to write it…but trash is trash, and trash doesn’t have a place in any novel of mine—uh, I hope not anyway. Long story short, there were only two things that survived that initial purge: the world itself and the characters.

If you’re saying ‘ouch’, my reply is ‘understatement’. It was a worse-than-gorilla-tape-being-ripped-off-your-arm kind of ouch.  But now, as I see my story finally coming together, I’m outrageously happy I ditched the ‘original’ version…it’s SO much better now. So. Much. Better.

Bring on the Freedom!

Hiatus status: officially over! Yay *claps*

Basically the new strategy for DaybreakInAutumn is to simply be myself and express who I am in the everyday...which is significant because 1) this blog, which admittedly was created for the purpose of platform-building and work, was getting to be too much like…well…work; and 2) I felt that having 4 categories to post in was far too limiting.

Most importantly, no more dreadfuls (uh, deadlines). I enjoyed posting about what I did, but having deadlines for posting left me in a nearly perpetual state of frazzledom. 

But take away the deadlines and—boom, baby! The pressure is gone, and I can use my brain again and function normally. Ironically, when I was trying to squeeze topics out of my psyche in order to post by certain dates, it was unbelievably difficult…but as soon as I got rid of the whole date mentality, I realized I have loads of things I want to post about.

Who cares if that makes absolutely no sense? I’m going with it.

Anyway, I’m happy to announce that I’ll be heading in some other new directions as well—putting up more ‘random’ posts, putting up posts with fewer words, and putting up posts for the pure enjoyment of their subject matter rather than solely for their practicality. Huzzah!

Bring on the freedom.*

*Cyber-five from me if you just read that in your head as though Kronk from the Emperor’s New Groove was saying it. Hilarious 

Being vs. Doing

I was kind of hoping I’d be back on track with this blog, going through my normal routine.

I’m thankful that I took the time to honestly evaluate what I was writing about here because, while I am happy about the things that I’ve written and think that they are worthwhile to read, I was unhappy about my blog as a whole.

Being different has always been important to me. It’s part of my personality; P’s don’t like to be boxed in (I’m an INFP—or INXX if you want to get technical). But it’s also my humanity coming forth, echoing a desire from my heart to be unique…because we are  all unique.

We have different talents, skills, tastes, assignments, etc. And I want to reflect that uniqueness because it is part of who I am/who I was created to be.

This is where I start getting philosophical, so hang in there if philosophy isn’t your cup of tea. If it is, enjoy!

We are unique. Yet, at the same time, we are all essentially the same as humans; we all have the same purpose: to be.

Blackberry theme (Secret Place). Perfect! :)

Consider the essence of being and its importance—and no, I’m not just speaking Heidegger, although I am convinced he was profoundly changed by the study of Being—everything we do, say, or think all stems from who we are.   

To discover the true essence of something, it must be traced back to its source, its life. Where my existence stems from, therein lies my being. If I am apart from the source of my existence, I cease to be in the most fundamental sense of not just the word, but the action, the life of all that it is to be!

The point for my blog: I want my blog to be a representation of who I am….which means that I will be displaying who I am in Christ, because my identity—my true identity—is only made clear in His presence…and thus, I will be showcasing by the life that I live, by my being that is only found in Christ Jesus, Who God IS.

To help in understanding this concept of Being, I’d like to share a few passages from The Secret Place.

God says to Dale Fife, the author:

“Meaning is found in the fact of life itself. So many people try to find fulfillment in what they do, instead of who they are and Who I am.”*

God goes on to say, “Adam was formed so that I could walk with him, not so that he could tend the Garden. I did not create Adam because I needed a gardener. Work is a result of life, not the purpose and meaning of life. Your forefathers were correct when they said, ‘The chief end of man is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever.’”

Isn’t that beautiful? (And the part about Adam not being created because God needed a gardener hilarious?? I thought so anyway…) Doesn’t your heart beat faster when you read that—to know that God wants you for you, not simply what you do, or could be made to do?

I’m not a gardener/writer/worker subjected to futility, but a companion of God with the privilege of delighting my soul each and every day in Him.

“I have made all mankind because I desire companionship. You were made to have communion with Me; that is your purpose and the purpose of every man and woman on earth. Enoch discovered that his life was satisfying as long as he enjoyed communion with Me. I want you to understand this same simple truth: your fulfillment flows out of communion with Me. All things find their true meaning for existence in Me. When you separate yourself from Me, the purpose for which I created you is denied.”

I want to write about living, and living abundantly. I want to write about my fulfillment in Christ, my joy in finding myself in Him, and being with Him. I want to write passionately about the things that He created: art, music, birds…

“Do you understand, son? Today’s lesson is on being. I made you to be with Me, to enjoy Me, and to walk with Me. Everything flows out of intimacy with Me. Purpuse, meaning, goals, even creativity—all these things are a result of your relationship with Me, and are enhanced by the time you spend with Me. My nature is ‘I AM,’ not ‘I DO.’ Without Me, you can do nothing. You are a human being, not a human doing. You must learn how to be.”

We must all learn how to be. 

So simple…yet so often overlooked. I told you Heidegger was onto something profound, and it changed him. :)

Overall I am saying that I need more time to revamp and start anew. Not a super long time—just two weeks to start up again on March 19^th.

Peace ^_^

*I’ve been doing some serious soul searching, and this past week I was about to go to bed and was looking for an interesting book to read. I found The Secret Place. Thinking it was going to be something like Narnia or some wild fantasy adventure, I hopped on board…only to discover that it was not, in fact, fantasy, but the story of the spiritual communion the author experienced/experiences with God.*